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Wednesday, 22 August 2018 / Published in Dating, Relationship

Future of Dating: in a bad economy

There has been a lot of news lately about job cuts in both public and the private sector in South Africa; this is despite a very brutal current reality of the high unemployed rate South Africa has. Unemployment is linked to so many factors, like depression, crime, bad health, high divorce rate and low intimate relationships. There is no denying that the more the economy suffers, the more the homes are affected, and the more the homes are affected the more intimacy and love is affected. There has been a lot of research done on how for example, unemployment leads to relationship instability, it’s not just unemployment though, and new entrepreneurs suffer from this instability in their relationships as well.

Is it still fair to be subjected to “for richer or poorer” vows?

The world is suffering from lack of money, added to that suffering lack of love or healthy relationships. If you are an oldie R&B lover like me you will know songs like “no romance without finance”. Financial stress is already the number 1 cause of relationship breakups and divorce.

Apparently more and more relationships are cohabiting because economically it makes sense, all the rules about culture, religion etc are out of the way, they say two heads are better than one, but this also means people are stuck in relationships they don’t want to be in anymore because it makes financial sense. We all want financial stability, this to most of us is more important than love. A lot of us would go for a partner who offers more financial security and stability but half loves us than one who doesn’t offer the greatest security but fully loves us. As much as unemployment may not stop us from falling in love but it is going to delay what matters to most women… tying the knot.

Big question is can you “tough time” proof your relationship. Truth is, every time one loses business or a job it hits hard on their self esteem and this can mess you up, more so if you still have to worry if your partner is going to remain the same with you, if they won’t leave you or if they will be there for you. You become socially isolated when you have no money. How are you going to ensure you don’t lose your confidence should you lose your job? Did you even choose a right person to partner with through the good and bad states of life? How are you being supportive to your partner going through this?

We are looking at a future where it will be luxury for a man to take a woman out on fine dining, people will stay longer than they should with parents, and the high standards we have now will be dead. Dating will be too expensive… but with all that stress does it mean we should expect to be loveless, or miserable in relationships and marriages? As it stands I have had a lot of conversations with men saying they are too broke to date or have a girlfriend…put the pressure of the rising food and petrol cost to that, can they even afford to pay attention?

What is the future of dating & relationships? When the rand is low, the stress is high, the love is low, the basics are no there and the libido is out of the door…what are you going to do to keep the fires burning? Do you talk about the “what ifs” with your partner? How prepared is your relationship for bad economy? Will recession be the end of your relationship? Are you prepared to support your partners’ ladies and gents?

Start talking about it. What is the future of your relationship in such times?

#SocialnDatingCoach

#CoachKB

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My name is Makabelo Motaung. I am an experienced, Social and Dating Coach, Motivational Speaker and Relationship Expert. A regular Contributor at one of the most watched TV shows on SABC 1 Mzansi Inside and daily Thetha. A residential coach for Power FM, Cape Talk as well as VOW FM ( Radio) and I’m also a resident advice columnist for FullFlair Magazine, Star News Paper, Destiny Magazine and Cape Argus. I also facilitate Goddess Gatherings.

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